Best
Lines of each Gilmore Girls episode:
Are you ready???
Season 1:
Episode 1: Are you my new
daddy?? –Rory
People are particularly dumb today. I can’t talk to any more of them. –
Michel
Episode 2: Drug dealers take
the bus.”- Emily
Episode 3: I’m sure you
could borrow your mother’s golf clubs that are upstairs collecting dust like
the rest of her potential.” –Emily
He says he’s your father, but why he’d volunteer that information
willingly, I don’t know.”- Michel
Episode 4: “…or Il duce as
he is more commonly referred to in your home.” –Max.
Episode 5: I don’t think
Claudia is planning on dying a second time. – Emily
She looked like she was sleeping. I thought she was asleep, so I nudged
her and she didn't wake. I gave her a push and she fell off the couch, and
since I'd just waxed the floor, she went shooting across the room. And then she
knocked over the lamp and she still didn't move. I knew it was over. –Babette
Episode 6: Because of the
pudding. The pudding!
Episode 12: I want to be the
girl. –Sookie
But you are the girl, that’s why we’re having this confusing
conversation. – Lorelai
You know the one great thing we all learned from this? I’m a babe. –
Lorelai
Episode 15: Charles Manson is completely freaked out by
you right now!- Lorelai
Episode 16: What have you
done now? -Richard
Nothing. I’m putting the bunny back with his friends and I sort of, uh,
massacred them a little bit, but that’s life in the jungle isn’t it?- Lorelai
Just sit with your hands in your lap. –Richard
Episode 18: I need the hat
rack. -Emily
The fish flies at night. – Lorelai
Episode 19: My first complete
sentence was big head want dolly .- Lorelai
But let’s be honest- the entire opening conversation is just absolutely
amazing!!!
Episode 21: Look, I’ve made my peace with the fact that
everyone that calls here is a notch above brain dead and that the pennies I am
thrown each week are in exchange for me dealing with these people in a
nonviolent manner. And usually that is fine, but today, sorry lady, I have
ennui. - Michel
So you’re sleepy? -Lorelai
It’s a metaphysical angst. - Michel
So you want to go to beddy-bye.
– Lorelai
Season 2:
Episode 1: You should walk
down the isle with something that smells really good. –Rory
Pot Roast. – Lorelai
Episode 2: Your head is much
too big for a veil. -Emily
Episode 6: The wrong one
[lipstick] and I’ll look like a hooker…or teacher. – Libby
Episode 7: If you want to
eat outside, find a gazelle. Make up your mind and I’ll be inside. – Emily.
Episode 8: Lorelei would you
like me to put a mirror in front of you while you talk? –Emily
There was a phony murder? - Mia
Yea, the town’s too dull for a real one. – Lorelai
Episode 9: Sookie: Swear. Raise your right hand and say,
‘May Destiny’s Child break up if I count these blueberries.’
Michel: Pick another group.
Sookie: Nope.
Michel: I hate you! Hate you!
Episode 12: How tall
are you? – Richard
Why, want to dance? –Dean
No, but thank you. - Richard
Episode 13: I think
we should get married. – Jackson
Are you pregnant? –Sookie
Episode 15: This isn’t about the fascists, who, by
the way, had their faults, but their parks were spotless. –Taylor
Episode 16: That’s a
pretty color, what is that? -Emily
It’s called vicious trollop. – Lorelai
Oh stop it. Now why would you name a lipstick something like that?
-Emily
Because dirty whore was taken? – Lorelai
Episode 17: I four
fourths don’t care. –Lorelai
Episode 19: Hey why
isn’t Jackson here?- Lorelai
Oh, he’s singing to his persimmons tonight. They’ve been a little sour
lately. –Sookie
It’s really fun to say- “hey I know that person. I see him every day
and so far, he hasn’t bitten me. – Lorelai about Kirk
Episode 20: – If we were gazelles, we’d be the first ones
eaten at the watering hole. –Rory
Episode 21: Hey, how
many margaritas is too many margaritas? Lorelai
When you can’t find the living room anymore. - Rory
Okay- I’m still good!- Lorelai
Episode 22: Oye with
the poodles already.
Remember it’s really wrong to gossip, unless it’s true or way too good
not to tell everyone you see, whether you know them or not. –Lorelai
Season 3:
Episode 2: I’d like
to have a good illness. Something different, impressive. Just once I’d like to
be able to say, “Yea I’m not feeling so good, my leg is haunted.” –Lorelai
Episode 5: Come here
you have dirt on your forehead. Oh- just kidding, it’s the mark of the devil.-
Lorelai
Remember only one or two crackheads at the most over. They eat all the
good cereal.- Lorelai
Episode 9:
But he [Kirk the cat] doesn’t have apposable thumbs.- Rory
He’s beyond them. He’s smart. He knows things sometimes before they
happen. –Kirk
Get ahold of yourself man. – Lorelai
You haven’t even heard the worst. When the attacks got particularly
brutal, I had no choice but to strip naked and hide under water in the bathtub.
I read that cats are afraid of water. Kirk isn’t. He found me. He seemed to derive
greater power from the water. That’s the when the bulk of the scratching
happened. – Kirk
Episode 12: Bad seed
of Nixon. – Rory to Paris
Episode 13: It’s from
my mother…..it’s heavy. It must be her hopes and dreams for me. – Lorelai
I thought she discarded those years ago. – Rory
Dear Mom and Dad, I’m in labor. See you later, Lorelai. – Emily
Episode 17: Very
weird vibe in here. Very Poe. – Lorelai.
Episode 22: We have
flying deer? -Luke
Season
4:
Episode 2: Copper
Boom. – Lorelai and Rory
Episode 3: My
mother’s been here. It smells like guilt and Chanel Number 5.- Lorelai
Episode 13: It’s a
complete disaster!!- Emily
My existence? –Lorelai
Episode 15: Why is
Kirk talking to his man purse? –Lorelai
Episode 16:
Smell my eggs.- Kirk
Not today Kirk. – Lorelai
Episode 20:
I stop drinking the coffee. I stop doing the standing, and walking and
the words into sentence doing. –Lorelai
Every day that you breathe you make my life harder. – Michel
Episode 22:
Tom, I love you like a $2 whore. - Lorelai
Great- I’ll tell the wife. – Tom
Season
5:
Episode 1: Only
prostitutes have 2 glasses of wine at lunch. –Richard
Episode 3: No Rory,
the great man was not brought down by my vagina. – Paris
Episode 9: Who is
this? –Lorelai
This is you in 20 years. WHO IS THIS? – Emily
Episode 10: Rory Gilmore, you should be ashamed of
yourself. Toying with these boys like this. They used to have pride. They use
to have dignity. They use to have balls.
Dammit, Gilmore, give them back their balls. –Finn (the epic scene (and my favorite) where
Colin and Logan pretend to fight over Rory and Finn pretends to be a Bobby and
breaks up their false fighting while Rory’s in class.
Buttface miscreant. -Rory
Episode 11: If I run
into any moderately weighted whores in my travels, I’ll let you know. –Luke
Lorelai, how would you like to play our woman of easy virtue? – Taylor
My girlfriend is the whore!!!! -Kirk
Episode 13: When a woman gives birth to a crack baby you do not
buy her a puppy. –Emily
Focus please. -Richard
I am a camera. –Lorelai
Season
6:
Episode 1: Whatever
you do, don’t tell the maids [the panic room code]. They tell their kids and
then they grow up and rob you. –Emily
Episode 4:
He’s snarky.- Lorelai
And sarcastic.- Sookie
He’s snarcastic. – Lorelai
Episode 5: I bet the
Romanovs never RSVPed either. They got theirs. - Paris
Episode 7: Go find your psychotic dog and I’ll set the
table.- Luke
Hey, you can pull link sausages out of me if you want. – Luke (great
end of the episode line)
Episode 11: We leave the tv on, even when we’re not here.
Rush Limbaugh, so the neighbors know we have guns. – Paris
I’m am not your mother or your hugger. If you need some love, get a
hooker. If you’re having a bad day, find a ledge or a way to deal. – Paris
Episode 14:
What is this feeling? This tightness in the chest, this anger mixed
with paralyzing weakness? – Luke
You’ve been Gilmored. – Lorelai
Episode 19: Which one
says “Hi I’m not a whore, enjoy your day.” –Lorelai
58 seats. 62 Koreans. –For Lane’s wedding (Rory and Lorelai and Miss
Patty)
Episode 21: Normally
I don’t like men’s hair so short. It makes them look like a convict or a
masseuse. –Emily
Season
7:
Episode 2: Shut up
loinfruit.- Lorelai
Episode 3: Gilmore do
you see any of my students falling in love with me? No. And you know why:
Because you don’t fall in love with people that make you want to crap your
pants. –Paris.
Episode 6: My system
is I open the mail once a month. –Lorelai
Episode 7: Mom, I’m
pregnant. We waited until after we were married. If you don’t believe us, we
have a note from our doctor, which doesn’t prove anything but it does firmly…….-
Lane
Hit me, hit me, hit me! It’s my fault!- Zack
Episode 15:
I swear, moths are like the loser butterflies that couldn’t get laid if
they tied a $100 bill to their…- TJ
I am kayak, hear me roar. – Lorelai (meaning she is independent)
Episode 16: God knows
my mom and I have differences. –Lorelai
Yes, God does know.- Mrs. Kim
Would you be their Lorelai Gilmore?- Lane
Episode 17: I mean, I’ve got my mom, but she’s not so much
a family member as a patrol officer. –
Lane
Episode 21: I have to
lean. This woman in front of my keeps rocking back and forth. It’s like sitting
behind Ray Charles. - Emily
